A Memory: May 31, 2010

With the universe, there is no beginning, no end. Life and love are eternal so there is no death as we have been programmed to believe.

When there is a death here on earth, we have mixed emotions. We feel a sense of joy that we are all part of -- and they are only returning to -- a vast and loving universe, and yet, we still grieve for the loss of what we had. We know we must go on; however, memories are like a jack-in-the box -- you never know when they're going to pop up, but it's always when we least expect them to. Sometimes we cry, sometimes we smile, sometimes we only sigh, but memories seek a validation and we must give them that. Only then, can we put them back and go on.

Today, I've validated a memory -- I remembered another magic whisper from the universe, and it was something that happened forty-one years ago.

My first husband was an army medic and we were still newlyweds when he was sent to Vietnam. He had been gone for about three months when I had a sudden urge to write a poem for him to include in the envelope with my daily letter. The poem wasn't hard to write, the words just flowed as though from somewhere outside myself. At the time, that was new to me, but it was the subject matter that surprised me. I had written a poem for him with such love, and from the vantage point of a devoted wife who was dying and saying her last goodbye to her beloved husband.

This memory popped up today because it's Memorial Day, I suppose, and the fact that Doug was killed before he got my letter with the poem. Three months after the funeral, the mailman brought me a stack of about sixteen unopened letters I had sent to Doug while he was in Vietnam. The Army sent a letter of apology along with the unopened letters, stating that because of his unit's placement in Vietnam, often the mail took a while to catch up with the men. Unfortunately, these letters had not found their way to where he was in country.

I sat on my bed and read all of the unopened letters to Doug, giving in to the fresh waves of grief that washed over me with each of the letters. Nothing could have ever prepared me for the relief and love I would feel when I re-read the poem I had written to Doug. Since he had never read the poem, it now had a whole new meaning. It was as though he had sent the poem to me. When I stumbled across the memory this morning, I asked, how could I have forgotten this magic gift from the universe?

If Only a Minute

If I only have a minute
to say goodbye to you
I will whisper what I’m thinking
when my time on earth is through.

I'll tell you how I’ve loved you
and how happy I have been
please don't think of me as leavin,
for I know we’ll meet again.

We'll hold each other close once more
I'll kiss away your tears.
We'll talk of precious things we’ve shared
through all the loving years.

When my time with you has ended
and He calls for me to come
Just know, I’ve always loved you.
Please take care of everyone.


A Box for Good Will
(autobiographical)

As a friend, I had come to help
yet one more time,
and I watched as she set
the cardboard box on the floor.
It was labeled for Good Will,
penned in large block letters.

From deep in the closet,
she brought out an old blue suit.
It had faded over the years,
but I saw in her eyes
the memories still had not.

Softly, she smoothed the sleeves
that dangled flat and empty.
Then she stroked the trousers
on the smooth wooden hanger.
Gently, she brushed
the dust from the collar and lapel,
and then I heard her sigh.
Her resolve had melted away.

Again we talked and remembered.
We spoke of long ago,
how the sleeves had encircled her
in warm secure hugs,

and the trousers had covered
lean muscular legs,
legs slightly bowed,
legs that loved to dance,

and what she missed the most
-- the heart that beat below
the lapel of the old blue suit,
the heart that beat with love for her.

For over thirty years,
the suit had stood sentinel,
loyally guarding both her
and those memories,
and I watched as she carefully
replaced the suit and closed
the closet door.

Through quiet tears
she asked once more,
how all of that could ever fit
in a box for Good Will.


In closing: I never thought I would love anyone as deeply again, but I do. Over the years, I had given up on ever feeling that way again, thinking we each have our one shot at love and mine came and went forty years ago. Then I went to a high school multi-year reunion and I fell in love all over again with the kindest, most gentle, sincere and loving man I have ever known.

Spirit Guides: Part 2

A couple of days ago, I wrote a blog about my Spirit Guide, Dinahh, who first appeared to me about six weeks ago.

I talked about the events leading up to that first meeting, how they affected me, personally, and how puzzling and preternatural it all seemed at the time, even making me feel like I was strange or worse, crazy.

 In closing the blog, I explained how this contact from the universe, my spiritual guide, Dinahh, helped me to see the intuitive whispers throughout my life not as a curse, but as a gift to be cherished.

Today, I am going to talk about something quite different, and from another angle entirely.

Years ago, when one of my daughters was a toddler and just learning to talk, she told me of her imaginary friend. This imaginary friend was real to her, even having a name which my daughter shared, as well ... Sherla.

With everything we did, Sherla had to be included. We had to set a place for her at the breakfast, lunch and dinner table. My toddler asked for Sherla to be tucked in, read to and even hugged at bedtime, and Sherla was even included when we said our night-night prayers. It was such an innocent pretense, and one I was happy to indulge my little girl in. When I was a child, my parents did the very same thing with the Boogie Man, but to assuage my fears.

I can't actually remember when Sherla ceased to exist in our house. One day, she just wasn't there any more. To the best of my recollection, it was about the time my daughter started school. This imaginary friend from long ago was never so significant then as she is now, after my visitation from Dinahh.

Was Sherla my young toddler's own spiritual guide, brought with her when she arrived in this world from the universe? It's an interesting question, isn't it? It's possible, even probable, that when my little girl started school and told other children, maybe even her teacher, about Sherla, her imaginary friend, it was pooh-poohed so heartily that my daughter stopped allowing Sherla's visits with her ... who's to say?

What I do know is this: my daughter has had many spiritual whispers (intuitions and precognitions) over the years, some of them I've already written about in other blogs here. Personally, I feel Sherla has always been with her. I'm basing this on what Dinahh told me on his second dream visitation to me. At that time I asked him, "Why are you here?" and he answered, "Catherine, I have been with you all along."

I would not be surprised at all if, at some point down the road, Sherla actually chose to reappear in my adult daughter's life, this time as her Spiritual Guide and welcomed.

With the universe, all is exactly as it should be ...

THE POWER OF LOVE WITHIN:

Today, I've the sincere pleasure of introducing the work of Geoff Pirie twice. I think you'll agree, he's a talented and spiritually moving writer. I first met him on Facebook and, after reading some of the beautiful things he posted there, instantly became a fan of his gentle, romantic style of writing.

And now, Geoff Pirie ...


THE POWER OF LOVE WITHIN:

To feel love for someone and to feel that love returned, is the most wonderful experience of our lives. When we feel love, we experience joy and fulfillment, but when it is absent we rapidly become unhappy and disillusioned. The search for love defines our lives and plays a critical role in the quality of our relationships. Love really does make our world go round!

Unfortunately we are rarely given any teaching about love, and yet with a little understanding and awareness it can transform our lives. Love can solve problems and heal emotional pain, but only when we allow ourselves to experience its power - we must invite love into our lives.

Consider for a moment the times when you have fallen in love or felt the love of a parent, child or friend. It is almost impossible to describe those comforting feelings of connection and well-being. Notice how anxieties and problems fall away to be replaced by solutions, ease and confidence. There is a timeless quality about love that buoys you up and protects you in even the most despairing of times. You are experiencing the power of love to heal and bring joy and success into your life.

Love is the fundamental truth of life. We are born to love and be loved. It is our natural state. Some people prefer to see this love as a characteristic of our humanity while others prefer to see it as the manifestation of a divine or spiritual source of love. Whatever our personal belief, the power of love is experienced when we connect open-heartedly with others and embrace our natural connections.

Our emotional and relationship problems result from our denial of love - our separation from the love that bonds all people and separation from our higher or spiritual source of love. This denial usually starts when we are very young and has a damaging impact on our lives. Perversely, we invent all manner of negative thoughts, feelings and behaviors to distract us from the love that we already possess. In romantic relationships we then search for love from another person, or try to gain fulfillment from material possessions, to replace the love that we believe is lacking within. This is a terrible mistake because until we have rediscovered self-love, we cannot give or receive love fully from somebody else.

Luckily the best place to work on finding self-love is within a supportive relationship. All relationships have their challenges and it is by working with our partner through the difficult times that a partnership is strengthened. Relationships fail because of our inability to get to the core emotional issues that create the separation. These will be our fears and insecurities and lack of self-belief. In our attempt to hide away any sense of low self-worth we make ourselves unavailable to our partner. It is like building a fortress around ourselves - we think it protects us but in reality it damages or even destroys our relationships.

The way to embrace our loving essence and our natural connections with others is to be willing to feel all our emotions and communicate about them maturely to our partners. We can also ask them about their feelings and commit to working with them to heal any fear. Normally we will find that they have just the same fears and insecurities as us, but may play them out in different styles. Getting to these core issues is the key to healing the pain and fear in a relationship and to becoming more bonded.

As we achieve such healing within our relationships we will automatically discover more success in our lives, we will feel more fulfilled and this will make us happier. We can all do this if we can find the courage to feel our emotions and reveal them within our relationships. As our hearts open we will feel all the love that has been hidden behind our defenses and our relationships will go from strength to strength.

Geoff Pirie: Copyright © May 2010:

Thank you most sincerely, Geoff. ~CJ

Spiritual Guides: Part 1

My Spiritual Guide, Dinahh, has brought me tremendous peace since he first appeared in my life about six weeks ago. His guidance has opened doors and bridged my gradual and growing spiritual awareness with the universe. He has allowed me to see that everything is as it should be and I am, thankfully, normal. Until Dinahh, I didn't always feel that way.

When I was a child, I was always aware that I was different -- none of my friends or siblings had this strangeness going on inside them. I had this ability to know things that had either happened or were going to happen to those I loved. These things came to me in the form of a strong inner feeling, a sense, which at the time I could not have explained to anyone besides my mother. All of them did come to fruition, which was frightening to me. (I've written about some of them here in my blog in the past). My mother was different, too, and she did all she could to assure me that my being "different" was a good thing, not bad, and to look at it as a special gift.

This gift continued through my teens, and then in my early twenties, it grew even stronger with vivid images that I could see when I closed my eyes. I also began having very focused intuitive and precognitive dreams which I also shared with mama -- all proved to be real, as well. At about that time, besides thinking of it as a private gift, I began to also think of it as having private "whispers", since that was how I sensed them.

As an adult, I quickly learned to keep most of these whispers to myself, taking whatever action I felt was necessary as a result of the vision to ensure the safety of a loved one, nearly always one of my three daughters. The few times I did talk about a whisper to my ex, (my daughters' father), it was made clear to me that he thought I was "weird" or "bewitched" and something like that just had to be evil. As a result, I stopped sharing them with him at all.

This different and isolated feeling continued (along with the "why me" aspect) until about a month before Dinahh entered my life. I had even begun to feel a little guilty for having the gift at all, and then a series of events signaled the onset of something coming. Something felt like it was about to happen.

One morning, I had to go the basement for a screwdriver. When I opened the basement door, the area was lit up by my battery-powered Christmas candles up high on a shelf, just above the stairs going down to the basement. The bulbs had to actually be screwed in to make the connection, yet they were all glowing brightly. I was amazed. I called Robert who was still living in Ohio and told him about it. He was as puzzled as I was.

On his next trip to visit me here in Pennsylvania, another incident happened. We were watching a movie on TV downstairs. I went upstairs to the bathroom during a commercial. As I passed the guest room, I noticed a reflection of the hall light glowing on the floor in the center of the room. When I walked into the room and turned on the light switch, I was stunned to see the 4-foot rectangular mirror from the wall above the dresser (three feet away) lying on the floor mirror-side-up in the center of the room. On top of the glass mirror was the 24-inch pottery lamp, which used to be sitting on the dresser. Neither the mirror or the lamp was broken.

I ran down the stairs and asked Robert if he had put the mirror and lamp on the floor -- he had no idea what I was talking about. I took him upstairs to show him my findings and he was mystified. The mirror was so heavy that it took both of us to lift it. It was odd, to be sure. There was no way it could have fallen without us hearing the crash from downstairs, and if both had fallen, they would have shattered.

The third thing was a couple of days later. I heard a loud whisper, an actual voice. I was leaving to do errands and had just grabbed my car keys. I heard a voice say, "You have a flat tire." When I went to my car, the left front tire was totally flat.

I remember talking with Robert in Skype and how we laughed about all of it. I said I felt like I was really losing it with all of this new strange stuff going on. Not long after, I had my first visit from Dinahh, who came to me in a dream as a small and wrinkled old man ...

To be continued ...

Every Woman

By now, you are all becoming familiar with the work of Robert Cosmar. He's intuitive, insightful, and he has this unfettered spiritual nature that I can't help but love. Robert has an open invitation to share on my blog, whenever the universe sends something his way. Guess what ...

Every Woman
by Robert Cosmar

Every woman is a mirror,
In thru which a man sees clear.

And no matter how much he tried,
He cannot hide from her his pride.

He cannot just walk away,
Unless inside he wants to play.

For she will make him to see clear,
What it is behind his fear.

She will take him as her own,
Strip him down unto the bone.

Make him see the ugly scar,
Let him know just how far.

He has wandered from his love,
That he came with from above.

So a man learns surrender,
For a woman to amend her.

Bring the two into the one,
Understand that love is fun.


Robert Cosmar is a talented writer, poet, and blogger.
His blogs:
http://magicmansmusings.blogspot.com/
http://magicmansstories.blogspot.com/
http://magicofloveandintimacy.blogspot.com/
http://magicmansastrology.blogspot.com/
http://magicmanspoetry.blogspot.com/
Facebook:
http://www.facebook.com/magic.man1951

Acceptance

I would like to introduce Robert Cosmar, a gifted writer and blogger, who just happens to be someone very special to me. I asked if he would do me the honor of being a guest blogger here on Knowing Whispers. His answer was yes, and now I would like to share his thoughts with you ...

Acceptance
by Robert Cosmar

When we are not born into complete acceptance, we are unable to bring with us the love we felt in the other world, the universe. This love, (our awareness), is a recognition of our full self. Because of the fear of our parents and society and the deep distrust of self and life, a gap begins between who we were in the universe and who we are now asked to be.

Great demands are placed on a child to conform and behave, according to the views of society and parents. Doctors, teachers and ministers all unwittingly conspire to make the child distrust and forget the innocence from which they came, forgetting the invisible friends and spiritual voices that they often hear. Children are shut down and taught to fear, just like grownups do. This fear and distrust carries over into all of their other relationships. It continues on into school and eventually dating, where even greater fear and ignorance is forced onto the consciousness of children.

Rather than being told it's okay to trust and believe in their feelings, many have formed judgments and suspicions that have no base in reality. This does not mean dangers don’t exist, but the individual freedom to decide within each experience becomes blinded by group paranoia.

If people are truly sick mentally and spiritually it is not because their inherent nature is bad before birth, but rather, because many of the ideas of humanity are restrictive, oppressive, and malignant and they are polluted after birth. A child is only able to bring through at birth that essence which the parents are able to receive and nourish. If the parents do not know love, acceptance and have awareness, then the child's magic is polluted.

Children are born magically innocent with the power to touch a heart, but their ability to create is years away, as well as their ability to understand the spiritual voices they heard as a child. If they can remember the magic, they can put together a whole lifetime of happiness. If not, then they, too, will struggle through the maze of false perceptions that exist with us here on earth.

To be truly happy, you must learn to accept everything, both the apparent good and bad. You must come to acknowledge that life is a mirror for your beliefs. Forgive your parents and society for their limited perceptions and begin to heed the whispers of your deep inner self and then follow the sounds of your own soul. Life is not against you; however, at birth, you were forced to not accept the total reality of who and what you are, what you can do and become, and why you are here.

Robert Cosmar is a talented writer, poet, and blogger.
His blogs:
http://magicmansmusings.blogspot.com/
http://magicmansstories.blogspot.com/
http://magicofloveandintimacy.blogspot.com/
http://magicmansastrology.blogspot.com/
http://magicmanspoetry.blogspot.com/
Facebook:
http://www.facebook.com/magic.man1951

Ellen's Story: A Visitation

God and the universe communicate with us in many ways.

A beautiful and inspiring story was shared with me yesterday, right after I posted the blog about spiritual visitations from the universe. This touching experience came from a good friend of mine, Ellen Silverthorn Howe. Ellen and I first met through Facebook and, through sharing, became fast friends -- she must surely be one of my soulmates, because I sense that I've known her forever.

After reading it, I asked asked if she would give me permission to post it here, both as an inspiration to others, and as a validation that spiritual visitations are just one of many gifts to us from the universe. I invite you to share her story.

"Thirty-one years ago, my Grandmother Silverthorn passed away. I had not really spent much time with her in her later years. As a new mother, I seemed to be caught up in my own life, and not hers. She would call me, but it seemed I was always too busy.

When she died, I was overwhelmed with guilt. I was there to plan her funeral and help pick out clothes, but the guilt never left me. My husband would tell me, "Ellen, you have to get past this."

One night I woke up and, as clear as anything, my grandmother was standing there at the bottom of my bed. She told me that she was okay. After that dream, or whatever it was, I felt at peace. Soon after, I found out that my daughter, Jenna, was on the way. Interestingly, she is very much like her Grandmother Silverthorn.

~Ellen Silverthorn Howe

Thank you for sharing, Ellen.
Love,
CJ

Visits: Dreams and Reality

Visits from loved ones in dreams, or even our realities, is a very sensitive issue with most people. They're afraid that the prevailing opinion of them will be that they are delusional, or worse, crazy. Whether or not that's true, I can't honestly say. I do know that I believe them and I know they're not delusional or crazy

I have several friends who have told me beautiful, touching stories of their own experiences, but they won't allow me to publish them here. Out of respect, I will honor their privacy. Trust me to say that if the majority of people were to read about their experiences, like me, they would also feel touched all the way down to their very souls -- others, I know, would also feel compelled to come forward with similar experiences of their own to share with you. It all comes down to strength and having the courage to bare one's innermost feelings by putting them out there.

I will try and get the ball rolling with a happening of my own ...

Now, to do this, I have to take you back in time. It was 2006. I was going through a very heartbreaking time. I knew my marriage was over, I just hadn't made it official yet by going to a divorce attorney. The one person I could always talk to, Mama, had passed away nearly fifteen years earlier and I missed her terribly.

One night when things were at their worst, I felt someone sitting on the edge of my bed in the middle of the night as I was crying. I sat up and there was my Mama. I remember not feeling frightened or surprised at all. It was just as it used to be. She asked me to share my feelings and I did.

When I got to the part about not trusting myself any longer, because I had chosen to marry someone so wrong for me, she reached out her arms and then held me. She told me to remember what she had always said, "Honey, everyone makes mistakes, it's part of life. It's what we do about those mistakes and how we learn from them, that's what's important. Just know, this was a lesson for you and everything is as it should be."

With that, she hugged me tightly and put her hand on my cheek. I remember it felt so loving and warm. Then she kissed my forehead, like she always did, and told me she loved me. Then she was gone.

To this day, I don't know whether she was really there on the edge of my bed, or if she came to me in a dream. I do know that my cheek felt warm, and I had a two-inch light red mark on my forehead all day the next day.

I truly believe that God does work magic and miracles. With the universe, anything and everything is possible. Yes, everything really IS as it should be. With God and the universe, there are no mistakes ...

Hugs,
CJ

Creativity: Using The Magic

What your Mind can conceive, the Universe will achieve. It's ... Magic. ~CJ Heck

As a writer, there have been times when the writing came so easily, almost too easily, as though it was coming from somewhere else, somewhere outside of me. Unfortunately, it doesn't happen often, but when it does, I call it listening to "The Magic".

One time in particular, I was in that place where I could feel the energy flow through me and a poem just came, like magic. When it was finished, I read what I had written. I was stunned, because the theme was so unlike anything I normally write -- from a child's point of view, this poem was about a child looking down from heaven and talking to her parents. Even though it was very different, I had a feeling, a sense of rightness about it, and included it in my first book.

Three years later, I had the wonderful opportunity to do a large school visit in Circleville, Ohio. Seven schools were to be bussed from surrounding towns to one central school where I would speak to students in groups. Over a three-day period, I did about five presentations a day. It was exhausting, but went very well, and I formed many wonderful friendships with the teachers and the librarian there. (To this day, Circleville remains as one of my favorite school visits ever).

A few weeks later, I got an email from the librarian at the main school. She had very sad news to share with me. One of the students, a second grade girl named McKenzie, had been killed in an auto accident riding in the car with her mother and little brother, who was badly injured, as well. The librarian wanted me to know that this little girl had loved the poem about the child in heaven. She carried my book everywhere she went and read the poem over and over to anyone who would listen -- teachers, students, parents, even her grandparents. She referred to herself as the angel in the poem, saying she wasn't afraid to die.

I was so touched by reading the email that I called and talked with the librarian. She shared so much more with me. At the funeral home, her parents had copies of the poem printed on pink paper, which they handed out to everyone who attended McKenzie's memorial service.

I finally knew why three years earlier I had been given the words to write the poem. There had been a reason, a spiritual purpose, and I was not privy to it at that time. That was the magic.

I wrote to the little girl's parents and grandparents. I wanted them to know how deeply I felt their grief and loss. I also needed them to know that nothing had ever touched me so deeply and personally. Then the magic continued ... her mother called me. She asked my permission for the family to have the poem etched onto McKenzie's grave stone. To this day, I have never felt so humbled as I did at that moment.

This is when I first began to sense how the magic in the universe works. We are all interconnected. An energy flows through us just like a river, and there is always a higher purpose to everything, even though we don't always know what that purpose is at the time; however, we are aware of and have a sense that everything is exactly as it should be. We must feel the energy, allow it to guide us and flow through us. This is ... the magic.

A Letter From Heaven
In Remembrance of McKenzie,
by CJ Heck

Mommy, Daddy, how I miss you
and I know you're missing me.
There are windows here in heaven
and every day I look and see

my toys all in the toybox
and my dolls up on the shelf.
I can't pull them in my wagon now
nor hold them to myself.

My little rocker's empty
and your arms feel empty too.
I can see the sadness in your face.
Mommy, Daddy, I love you.

My music box is quiet
but I don't need to hear it play.
Mommy, Daddy, it's not needed now,
angels here sing every day!

Please don't worry that I'm lonely,
there are children everywhere.
We are all His little angels
and there's so much love up here.

Mommy, Daddy, please don't cry for me,
heaven's such a lovely place.
God says you did your very best
and your love shows in my face.

Mommy, Daddy, when you need me
just look up and say a prayer.
I will see you through the windows
and I'll hear your voice up here.


Enjoy your day.
Hugs,
CJ

Soulmates

How do I know if I've met my soulmate?

This is something I've been wondering about for some time, especially since meeting my significant other. We have this uncanny, rare connection on most every level, something neither of us has ever experienced before. I know there are others out there who wonder the same thing -- I've heard them talk about it!

Well, the other night, I had the opportunity to ask Dinahh that question. Uncharacteristically, he got rather surly with me, like I was a wayward child asking the dumbest question he had ever heard.

Oh Dinahh explained to me what a soulmate is, but first he admonished me by saying he was surprised at me and the number of other humans who believe finding their soulmate is the ultimate of all loving relationships. He said we waste our whole lives searching for the perfect soulmate, instead of what we should be doing -- learning, preparing ourselves, evolving, and becoming more aware of our purpose in the universe. Only when we have done this, will we meet our twin soul. In Dinahh's words ...

"Catherine, you do not have only one soulmate! When your soul was born, it was created and formed within a group of souls. All of the souls in this group are your soulmates. These souls are the closest to yours in their spiritual makeup.

Each of these souls incarnates over and over, like yours, gathering human experiences along the way, and helping each other to become more aware. Over your various lifetimes, you will meet up with other soulmates from your group many, many times. There will be a deep, lasting love between you and you will easily recognize the spiritual bond you share."

I asked Dinahh, "Is this why sometimes I have this feeling that I've known someone all my life, when I've only just met them?"

Dinahh answered, "Yes, Catherine, listen to me. When soulmates meet in an incarnation, there is something for the two souls to realize together. It could be a lesson to be learned from one to the other, to grow and further evolve. It is also possible they will meet only to lessen karma. This is important, too.

You and your soulmates will share many experiences and lifetimes and in various relationships. You might be lovers, related as parent to child, or you might meet again as siblings or best friends. These relationships are designed to help each soul grow spiritually and to help each soul to further evolve.

So you see, on your spiritual path, you are not looking for one soulmate to complete you. (There is so much for you to learn)

This is all I have to say and I will go now."

Heaven: From a Child's POV

I'm giving my brain a short break from discussing Dinahh and his messages today ...

I thought it might be interesting to find out what a child's idea of Heaven is. I brought the subject up in conversation with a couple of my young grandsons and I was astounded by their insightful answers. I learned that children put a lot more thought into the Universe than we give them credit for. This poem about Heaven came from their delightful imaginations:

Heaven
(from a child's point of view)
by CJ Heck

Dear God,
I dreamed I came to Heaven
to have a talk with You.
I climbed right up some puffy clouds
til Heaven was in view.

It looked just like a castle.
It was high with many floors.
It seemed a million windows
overlooked the one huge door.

The door was gold and silver
and bright lights shined within.
Two boxes hung suspended there,
“Take a Prayer” and “Leave a Sin”.

Everywhere around me,
I saw people with white wings
and when I pushed the doorbell,
I heard angel voices sing.

Then the big door opened.
The kindest man stood there.
He said he’d be my tour guide
and to follow him upstairs.

Right inside the great big door,
I saw a handmade sign.
The lettering was very old
on wood of weathered pine.

The message was so simple.
It said only, “Welcome Home”
but that was enough to tell me,
here you'd never feel alone.

Each floor throughout the castle
was filled with happiness.
From the bottom to the top one,
I saw nothing but kindness.

Angels near the windows
stopped to hug and welcome me.
Others in the hallways
smiled and whispered quietly.

Each room on every floor
had a sign above its door,
carved in ancient lettering
which said, “Always Room For More”.

When my tour was over
and it was time to go,
I still had some questions left
that weren’t answered though.

Do just good kids go to Heaven?
Sometimes I do naughty things.
Am I still a good child too?
Will I have angel’s wings?

My tour guide hugged me gently.
He said he thought I would
‘cause Heaven has so many rooms
and every child is good.

When I left the castle
and I turned to wave goodbye,
an angel whispered You had been
my Heavenly Tour Guide.

The Strangest Dream

I had a very strange dream three nights ago. It was very cryptic and I'm sure it was intended to be symbolic. I'm also sure it must have a profound message, but it was so much different from my other dreams. To be honest, I've been wracking my conscious brain since to decipher what it means.

Last night at eleven, I was getting ready to head upstairs to bed when Dinahh spoke to me and said I was to write about the dream. I didn't see him, I sensed him. He told me, "Write so others can feel. Write so they can see what you've seen."

Up to now, Dinahh has been very straightforward with his teachings. (He continually tells me I have much to learn). In a previous blog, I explained that he doesn't appear to me any more as a little old man, but as an orb of glowing light. He also doesn't speak to me now, but I can hear, or sense, what he's saying as clearly as if he were speaking to me.

This dream began as the most recent dreams I've had of traveling to what I've come to think of as a universal plane. I was a glowing orb of light and flowing up and outward, twirling, sometimes at lightening speed. Like before, I sensed a euphoric softness surrounding me, like a whole-body caress, as I moved through the swirling colors I've described before. This time, though, I traveled to a different place. Instead of a place where I soared playfully in and among millions of other glowing light orbs, sensing a recognition with each of them, this time I was shown something very puzzling.

I was suddenly motionless before a very, very long oval table. All around the table were ornate wooden chairs. In each chair sat a large bird, its wings placed on the table before it like a human would place their arms. Behind each chair stood an ethereal being in a wispy white flowing robe.

All at once and in one united motion, all of the beings behind the chairs reached up over the birds' heads and I was stunned to see them gently help see-through ghost-like beings (that I can only assume were souls) rise up and out through the top of the birds' heads. As they softly rose, each soul floated up and off towards a different direction. As strange as it was, it was also very peaceful and beautiful and almost like I was sharing an intimate rite or birth.

After writing this part, Dinahh again spoke to me. He told me that I was not shown many chairs and many birds. I was shown only one bird in a chair with one spiritual guide standing behind. The bird was me. What I was watching was an awakening, a rebirth, of my soul into awareness. There were mirrors reflecting all the way down the table to show that this same awakening would also be happening to many. This is what I was to write.

There was something else strange in the dream and I'm sure this was symbolic, as well. In the same scene I was witnessing, to the right, way beyond the long table and chairs and filling the entire blackness, was a giant figure in a white long flowing robe. He seemed to be suspended in mid-air, as I could not see his feet at all beneath the flowing robes. He had his arms outstretched above his head and he seemed to be holding a towering and enormous glowing white ball with an uneven aura burning around it. It looked to me almost like a world or a planet because it was turning slowly within his arms. This, too, was peaceful, almost loving, and so beautiful. I had such an overwhelming sense of well-being and a pure childlike joy.

When I typed this part last night, Dinahh told me this was as it should be. He offered no further explanation, almost as though I should know what it meant.

If anyone reading this has any thoughts as to the meaning, I would love to hear them. I feel very isolated at the moment. There must be others who are experiencing this. I need to talk with them. As for me, I can only guess ... just for now, and based on what I saw in the dream, I tend to think I saw a Divine Power, God, cradling all of us. (sigh) Maybe Dinahh will see that I really have a lot to learn, take pity on me, and explain the rest.

Saturday, May 15, 2010

"Some days are diamonds, some days are dust, and some days ... well most days, are just a little bit of both." ~CJ

I really wanted to write something profound in my blog today, but I decided instead to share a little of me ...

My Other World
by CJ Heck

In sleep
life’s constraints
are unbuttoned and unzipped
cast off with the rest
of the laundry
in the hamper.

My pillow
a giant fluffy sponge
sops up leftover worries
spilling out my ears
from my mind.

In dreams
life is always fair
the good guys finish first
so it’s my number
that wins the lottery.

In my other world
I fly with dragons
caped and invisible
on flying carpet rides
to anywhere
reading minds
casting spells
seeing through walls
and solving problems
even my own.

Asleep and safe
there are no wrinkles
or gray hair
and varicose veins
are merely beauty marks.
The mirror says
I’m the fairest of all
and a genie in the lamp
grants my every wish.

My other world
is my haven
where I still believe
in fairy tales
Peter Pan
and Neverland
in guardian angels
and being in love
with happy endings.

Enjoy your Saturday, friends. I know I will!
~Hugs, CJ

May 13, 2010 ...

today the universe is coursing through my veins
I hear its loud and insistent
energy flowing in my blood
beating with my heart
its rapids rushing
streaking through turns
and coupled with the wind
it awes and fuels my wonder

waiting, waiting, waiting,
something's coming
something wonderful is coming

Another Dream Visit

“Somewhere, something incredible is waiting to be known.” ~Dr. Carl Sagan

"Sit down and write, Catherine. The words will come."

Dinahh said this to me in a dream last night. These words, with no "when" attached, are for the classic Type-A personality, the hardest words to hear and not exactly a blessing.

Since I first met Dinahh, I have learned through him and through reading that with the universe, time is an irrelevant term. Time doesn't mean the same here as it does with the universe. I wish I had a nickel for every time I've asked "when" and I've been told, "Everything is as it should be. Be patient, Catherine, you have much to learn. Everything is as it should be."

Several nights ago, I also had a dream. In that one, I traveled again, speeding through the swirling colors to the place I went before. I sensed Dinahh's presence there and he spoke. He told me things but didn't tell me to write them down. I am assuming that in last night's dream, he was referring to the previous dream. I will relay his message now.

"There is a big change to come. Nothing will ever be quite the same. Everyone's perceptions of things will change. Expect others to respect and value the truths we will tell you to write. You are a being of light with a purpose only you can fill. You will be told what to say and you will be writing this for others to read and understand. Our truth is valuable and we need you to speak it. You are to write the words from your heart, knowing what is said is true.

You will connect to the spirit within you and recognize that you are a channel of love and wisdom. You are to honor this gift. Your unique feelings of joy and expression will allow you to share things we tell you through the power of love and respect. You may go now."

That was all he said and I woke up ... and damn, I still feel like I'm in the Twighlight Zone.

Tuesday, May 4

I'm taking a little break ... my daughter from CT and her two little boys are coming for a week and I'm gonna be in Grammy heaven enjoying the warm and fuzzies ...

"Life’s most soothing things are a child’s goodnight and sweet music." ~Thomas Edison

Write to me and share your stories.

Hugs,
CJ

Children and Awareness

I remember hearing a story once about a small boy talking with his father. They were deep in conversation about some topic - what it was about totally escapes me - but anyway, the little boy asked his father if he had been able to do that when he was a little girl. The father told the child in no uncertain terms that he had always been a little boy. The boy emphatically disagreed. He said he could remember very well being a little girl and proceeded to tell dad a few of the things from that time. The father again stopped the child and admonished him for making up such an unbelievable story.

Are children naturally more aware because they're still close with the universe, and thus still connected to their beginnings? That's a stellar question anyway you slice it. I'm still so new to all of this, but it makes perfect sense to me. Shouldn't children be encouraged to share those memories while they're still so fresh in their minds? There is so much we could learn from them.

I know when I was a child, I remember sensing things, having intuitions, even more often than I do now. I also had a lot of deja vu experiences, although what those have to do with the universe, I haven't a clue. I do know I had a childhood fascination with Peter Pan when Mary Martin did the stage play. I had always believed I could fly and actually had memories of flitting about at incredible speeds. Seeing Peter Pan was like a validation of those memories and no one could tell me differently. I even tried to fly by jumping off of a bookcase. I ended up at the emergency room with six brand new stitches in my eyebrow. Did those things mean I was more aware as a child? I dunno ... I'm looking for answers. If you can help, please jump in at any time.

Wouldn't it be something if children were encouraged to remember? What if they could actually do psychic healings by allowing the incredible energy from the universe to flow through them to heal. Again, I would love to see children encouraged to share their memories of another time and place, instead of being told those experiences are from a dream, or worse, that they're lies. We have so much to learn.

We come into this life innocent and still partly aware and then spend the whole of our lives being force fed the delusion that what we see and experience here is only what is real. At some point, a few of us begin to question. We have experiences, whether they be intuititive, whispers of precognition, or an outright contact with the universe, and it turns our world upside down. As someone who is going through this, I can tell you, it's a much slower process to remember, to gain awareness, when you are an adult ...

Journey to Discovery ...

I'm surprised at the number of people who believe that if you have an interest in astrology, anything to do with metaphysics and the spiritual, or if you've felt the incredible strength of energy flow through you from the universe, you are dabbling with the occult and it's evil. That's just not true at all.

If there's anything I'm certain of after these experiences I've had (and am still having), it's that there's definitely a God, a higher power, over the entire universe and all of this is good, not evil.

What I'm learning is that the universe is wonderful, it's beautiful, it's awesome, and everything is as it should be -- by that, I mean I get a powerful sense that all is well, it's an euphorical feeling that's all-consuming. It seems to be most approachable through genuine love and intimacy -- at least that's when I've felt this energy flow the strongest. It's like a rushing river going through me, and it takes me from where I am at that moment to wherever it is I'm going out there. I am light, pure feeling, sensing light. I'm in a rush through swirling colors in a blur, and it's like a ... a whole body caress the whole time.

If you are wondering ... no, I don't take drugs.

Once there, there's a sense of flitting, darting, and for lack of any other way to describe it, speeding like Tinkerbell in Peter Pan and feeling like a child, almost like a remembering of total joy and wonder. I've passed other glows of light and felt an instant recognition, like maybe the souls of those I've known. This is where I'm not clear at all and I feel a frustration. Maybe at some point, Dinahh will teach me. He has often said I have much to learn.

These experiences I've had of traveling somewhere with Dinahh came about through dreams, at first, like what I've previously written about in other posts in the blog. The past two times, however, I have traveled alone. Again, this was facilitated through great feelings of love and intimacy. This last time, I merely sensed Dinahh as I rushed through the swirling colors. He told me that this wasn't the only plane I could visit. There were others that he would show me in time.

Now I'm really confused. I'm continually asking, "Why me?" Is it because I've always been sensitive to feelings of intuition and premonition? I went online to try and find others who had experienced this. I have found nothing so far. Also nothing to suggest other planes, either.

Thank you for coming with me on this journey of discovery. If you can offer any explanations, please contact me.