Spiritual Awakening

Your vision will become clear only when you look into your heart. Who looks outside, dreams. Who looks inside, awakens. ~Carl Jung

The awareness I've been experiencing is so wonderful. I've learned so much from my spirit guide, Dinahh, since he first appeared to me in a dream in March as a tiny, wrinkled old man. After three different visits from him in that form, he then showed himself to me as a glowing orb of light. When I asked him why he had come as the little old man, he explained that it was someone I could accept at that time and not be frightened. He was probably right. Even the little old man frightened me, at first.

On his first visit to me, in a dream, I remember asking him who he was and why he was sitting on my back steps. He told me his name was Dinahh. He said I had much to learn and he was going to teach me. He also told me I ask too many questions and besides, I already had all of the answers to everything here inside of me.

On the second visit from Dinahh, when I asked him why he had come to me, he told me he had always been with me. Now it was time for me to awaken and to remember (he stretched this word out, softly). I didn't know what he was talking about, but I had no reason not to believe him.

I've always had what I called whispers, even as a child, things that I would "see" in a dream, things that would actually happen. I just didn't know where they came from. Mama always called what I had, my "gift", even though I didn't always think of them in quite that way and mostly kept them to myself so I wouldn't be teased. Mama also had them, and her mother, and now, a couple of my daughters also share the gift.

I have shared many of those whispers from my life in other blogs. There have also been several dreams I've written about here in my blog, dreams that actually turned out to be visions. What I am learning about these things is that there is a difference between them.

A whisper is something you get while you are awake. It can come from a spirit guide, or an angel (yes, Dinahh told me we do have guardian angels). A whisper tells you to take a different route to work and you find out later there was an accident on your normal route. A whisper tells you to call someone and when you do, you find out they were just thinking of you because they needed you. I had a whisper once that told me I'd better leave early for work because I would have a flat tire ... I did.

A different kind of a whisper, the kind I've mostly had in my life, is an intuitive or precognitive whisper. For me, it always happens in a dream. I've written about them in my blogs, too. With those, you "see" an event that hasn't happened and, in time, it does.

Lately, what I have been experiencing is a series of visions. These happen in that twilight area, just before sleep, or in a dream. Sometimes, I've needed to discuss them with Robert, just to make sure they are what they seem to be. The last one of these was two nights ago.

Just as I was starting to drift off to sleep, a pale blue, glowing cloud/mist flooded my closed-eyed black 'screen'. It floated awhile, then congealed into my house on the right, and into a person on the left, who was standing in my yard. What I could 'see' was then a glowing light blue person and my house, but there was something like an arm in a diagonal direction across the whole scene. I couldn't see the entire house or yard because of it.

The next morning when I asked Robert about it, he kept saying "Interesting". He said the glowing and the light blue color was very good. It signified spiritual awareness. The person was most probably me, and the house was obviously our house. He thought the 'arm' in the way was telling me that I was becoming spiritually aware, or maybe signifying my growing spiritual awakening -- either way, he felt it was probably saying I still had a lot to learn.

I was glad to hear his explanation ... I had been afraid it had been a whisper of precognition, one telling me our house would burn down or something.

Hugs, CJ

Karma

Today is Robert's birthday and tomorrow is his father's. At noon today, we're heading to Coshocton for the weekend for a double birthday bar-b-que celebration at his parent's house. Should be a lot of fun and we're both looking forward to it -- Daddy is even driving over from Columbus, and I'm happy I'll get to visit with him, too. Our parents went to CHS together and hung out years ago ... it's amazing to me when I think about how long ago it was that Robert and I knew each other as children.

Robert is fond of saying his strongest memory of me, one he never forgot, was when our mothers took the lot of us to Forrest Hills to go swimming when I was about twelve and he was ten. He says I was sitting with his sister and mine in the middle seat of the station wagon, he was in the back with my brothers and his. He said when I turned around and looked him directly in the eye, he held his breath. He had never seen eyes quite like mine. He makes me blush, even now, when he says, "It was the first time I had been so close to a goddess."

It's surprising, but neither of us even remembers the other one all through high school -- then again, we were two years apart and traveled in different friendship circles. Then, about four years ago, he found my website online and sent me an email, but he said I "blew him off" by not responding at all. This wasn't my usual behavior with emails, but four years ago, was just about the time I was going through my second divorce. Other than that, there was no contact at all between us in all those years, until he organized the 2009 multi-year CHS reunion.

I never enjoyed reunions. The three I did go to during all those years were the result of pressure from my friends -- I definitely did not plan on going to this multi-year one. Then, someone forwarded one of Robert's emails to me about the reunion. It was totally impersonal, full of factual information, but I remember, it spoke to me. It was like a whisper of something and I felt the magic. I wrote an email back and before long, we were talking about everything and anything. With each email, it happened again, that feeling of magic and recognition, like a whisper from somewhere, almost like a promise.

I wish I could say, "The rest is history". That would be so romantic, but I can't say that. The feelings I was having scared the shit out of me. After being widowed and then divorced twice, I had finally accepted that what I had with Doug would never come again. Two years after the last divorce, I had settled nicely into my life and it was finally comfortable. I was happy on my own, making my own decisions. No real highs, but no real lows, either. I had been dating a wonderful man who was convinced that I was "the one". I loved him as a friend, but I knew he wasn't the one. I had already had my once-in-a-lifetime.

What I felt when I even read Robert's words in an email frightened me. They slammed me back into what I had felt with Doug. I never thought I would feel that way again, AND I didn't think I wanted to, so I wrote Robert a short good-bye forever email.

Then late that night, he called me from out under the stars. It was the first time I had heard his voice in nearly fifty years. I felt the whisper again, and I also felt the magic, and from somewhere down in my soul, I knew he was the one. He still had one test to pass, though, we both did. We had to meet in person. Needless to say, I went to the multi-class reunion. We met and hugged and the years melted away. As I snuggled his neck and breathed him in, I knew I was home.

Was it some sort of good karma and we were destined to meet again, so many years after we were those two young kids in a station wagon? I tend to think that day, so long ago, was God and the universe's way of one huge and comical tease.

"Take a GOOD long look, you two. You both have a lot to learn and even more to experience first in this lifetime, both good and bad, but you were put on this physical plane for each other and someday, you'll have a lot to creatively share ... together."

Twin Souls

Twin Souls 

This is sort of a Part II for a blog I wrote back on May 19, 2010, called "Soulmates".

The blog came about as the result of a visitation I had from Dinahh, my spirit guide. I asked him at that time how I would know if I had met my soulmate.

He set me straight on that, explaining that we meet many soulmates on our journey to enlightenment here on the physical plane, but since I wrote that blog, I have been wondering about something else he mentioned. Until now, I didn't have a chance to ask him about it. Here's an excerpt from that original blog:

Dinahh explained to me what a soulmate is, but first he admonished me by saying he was surprised at the number of humans who believe finding their soulmate is the ultimate of all loving relationships. 

He said we waste our whole lives searching for the perfect soulmate, instead of what we should be doing -- gaining wisdom, preparing ourselves, and becoming whole and more aware of our actual purpose in the universe. Only when we have done this, will we meet our twin soul.

"Catherine, you have much to learn. You do not have only one soulmate! When your soul was born, it was created and formed within a group of souls. All of the souls in this group are your soulmates. 

These souls are the closest to yours in their spiritual makeup ... you will meet many of those soulmates in this and in all your lifetimes ..."

I recently had another visit with Dinahh and this time, I asked him to teach me about twin souls. Dinahh told me each of the souls in our original group is also split into two perfect halves. This is what creates twin flames, also known as twin souls.

"Catherine, each twin soul is a complete and perfect soul. Each has only one twin. Each soul incarnates over and over, gathering human experience along the way, eventually coming together in one final union. This will be when they are both enlightened and in perfect harmony in their last lifetimes on the physical plane. They will then ascend together to the spiritual plane. 

Before each half of the one soul (the twin flames) can be reunited, they will have been together many times first as soulmates. Each twin is on its own spiritual path to enlightenment. They must both come to recognize their own spiritual baggage and overcome it, learn from it, and then they have to let it go. 

Listen to me, Catherine, this is very important. Their entire focus is to become more whole, balancing both the female and male halves to become enlightened before they can reunite with their twin soul. All other relationships through all of their lifetimes are like a training for the ultimate twin soul relationship. 

When these twins are in perfect harmony and meet, instinctively they recognize in each other a sense of being home. All of their chakras will be activated through a swirling of energy and they will go home again in the universe as one light. They will soar together through other beings of light and displays of swirling color. They are able to see themselves out of their bodies and joined together as one light. They will even communicate like you and I do, with their thoughts alone. 

Once the twins come together, their spiritual growth and awakening will speed up. They will gain wisdom and experience other consciousness levels. Their spiritual guidance will be strong and one or both of them will have a good channel for communicating with us on spiritual planes. The twin flame reunion is the most rewarding relationship a soul can have on every level."

I asked Dinahh, "If I meet my twin in this lifetime, does that mean we are both enlightened and ready to end our journeys here?"

Dinahh answered, "Not necessarily, Catherine. Many attempts at twin flame reunions do not work because one or the other soul may not be ready for the union. It is more intense than any other union because it is at the soul level. The strongest attraction is in spirit, not in the physical or even emotional level. The chance of meeting and staying with your twin has more to do with how evolved each soul is and how much earthly baggage you have cleared away in this life and in your past lives.

In the presence of your twin, there can be nothing between you. There can be nothing blocking the closeness. Everything must come up for healing that isn't already healed. Everything, Catherine. For the reunion to be right, this must be so. There will be huge creative energy released -- it is to be used for creating together to help the planet and to help other souls in their spiritual journey on the physical plane. This will make a huge shift in consciousness and the twins must be prepared for this. 

This is the reason, the primary reason, for twins finding each other. The union will be more intense than any other union and it will be on a soul level between these two perfect halves. They will have been together many times before, first as soulmates, possibly even as twins who were not spiritually ready for their eventual reunion. In this case, they will incarnate yet again to continue their spiritual growth and awakening.

Catherine, I will go now -- I leave you with much to think about." I thanked Dinahh once again and we were done.

In closing, I think I should repeat something that Dinahh has told me time and again. Instead of wasting time searching for love, we should be focusing our lives on living in the moment, becoming more aware, and recognizing what our earthly baggage is so we can rid ourselves of it.

With God and the universe, we are each seen as being on our own separate journey to awareness. Each of us has the ability to sense and use the magic, to feel the energy, and to use the gifts we have been given. Everything is as it should be and we are in our own perfect rhythm. No choice is a wrong choice -- we have lessons to learn from each of them.

When the universe feels we are ready, love will find us.

Moving Things Around

I've written several blogs over the past few months about some happenings that I have considered strange. For those of you who haven't read those particular blogs yet, they involved the (unobserved by me) movement of some heavy objects in my house and the sudden lighting up of some battery-operated Christmas candles that I had stored on a shelf just inside my basement door.

Since the events all happened by themselves and at about the time I began this journey into awareness -- before my spirit guide, Dinahh, first appeared -- I later assumed that Dinahh had been behind them, to "announce" his coming presence in my life. Boy was I wrong ...

Sunday afternoon, Robert and I were upstairs changing into workout gear so we could head to the gym. As we came down the stairs, we noticed that our 24" x 18" glass and wood-encased clock was on the floor below the oak slant-top desk where it had hung on the wall above. The glass front was not broken. It was lying on the floor beside the inner piece with the clock face and, beside them were the wooden pieces for the case, all laid out on the rug.

Robert and I looked at each other blankly. "Hmmm ... Is Dinahh at it again?" I asked.

As we picked up the pieces and set them aside to reassemble later, Robert answered, "No, Babe, I think the nail must have given way. You should probably use a stronger nail."

I went over to the wall to look -- the nail, a very strong nail, was still solidly there. I made a mental note to ask Dinahh about the clock, and about all of the other strange things, the next time I had a visit from him. It had been a couple of weeks since we last visited, but he always seemed to have other things for me to learn or understand so I never had the chance to ask him before. That chance came yesterday.

I was up very early on Monday, 5:00. After getting a few things done online and around the house, I decided to nap for while at 8:00. Sure enough, Dinahh showed up. He said, "So, we are ready to learn today then, Catherine?"

I told him I was, but first I wanted to ask him something. I asked why he moved things around and did things like he did, beginning with the lit Christmas candles on the shelf on the basement landing and then yesterday (Sunday), the clock.

Dinahh told me he was not permitted to interfere on this plane by doing such things. His purpose was to guide and teach and further my awareness. He wanted me to also write about our visits. Besides, he told me I had sent him those messages ... "Messages?" I asked incredulously. "What messages?"

He answered, "Of course, Catherine. Your message yesterday told me it was time. You were ready now to proceed."

"Wait, wait, wait," I said shaking my head, "I know I didn't do that stuff. I was downstairs when that huge mirror over the dresser landed on the floor with a lamp standing on it. Robert and I heard nothing! That mirror took two of us to lift and put back onto the nail on the wall! We would have heard it fall! Besides, I didn't even know you then. Why would I send a message like that to someone I didn't yet know?"

Dinahh spoke again. "Catherine, each was a message to me that I received. You were beginning to "see", not clearly, but you were getting the images and the messages I was sending to you in your sleep. Do you remember?"

I told him that in a dream a few months ago, it was true, I had almost been able to see a large eye. And then in another dream, I saw a little old man in a white robe sitting on my back porch, which was actually Dinahh as he first appeared to me.

Dinahh told me the lit candles represented my clarity. I wasn't able to see clearly what he was sending me so he had understood my message with the candles.

I was still dumbfounded. Then he explained the mirror on the floor with the lamp on top of it, which happened a few weeks after he and I had begun his visitations with me. He told me the mirror represented my desire to see deeper into myself and to become more aware. He understood that message, as well.

He told me this was a special gift and this gift had been with me always. I asked him why the gift had to be so destructive -- mirrors on the floor, clocks in pieces -- also on the floor! He said it was undeveloped yet and that was the only reason. I picked up on the word "always" just then. I asked him what he meant by always. What else did I ever do that was even close to this?

Here is where he really blew me away ... Dinahh took me into the past. I was suddenly back in time, sitting on my navy blue sofa in the TV room, and the TV was on with sports, and my three daughters were ten, twelve, and fourteen. I remembered the day vividly -- it was the day we thought the house was haunted. Wait, I'll tell you about it.

Report cards had been sent home and my ex was very dissatisfied with the grades. I had forgotten how abusive he could be, and on this particular evening, he was red-faced and shouting at each of them about their grades. In the middle of the name-calling and finger-pointing, a baby cried loudly upstairs. We were stunned into silence at first, and then I watched as all three girls ran up the stairs to investigate. Of course, when they got upstairs, they found nothing, but each found other reasons to stay upstairs and away from their dad's temper.

Still in his rage, he then turned his attention to me. Within two minutes, I saw the dial on the TV set zoom through all of the channels going up with a furious click-click-click. The the dial reversed directions just as suddenly and raced through the channels going down in the opposite direction. Then it happened again and again. Silence. His rage was then aimed at the TV set ... and right then, I returned to the present time.

Dinahh told me that I had done those things, too. My maternal instinct had protected the girls and then I had affected the TV to divert his attention again, this time away from me.

At this point, my oldest daughter called my cell phone and woke me. Up until I had this visit from Dinahh, I was finally beginning to feel like I wasn't in the Twilight Zone.

Any thoughts, people?

Front Porch of Forever

I know, I know, there have been tomes written about meeting someone, that special someone, and knowing a genuine love. We all share that desire, to love, be loved, and be in love. We know it's out there somewhere, we can sense it in our dreams, if only it would come and find us.

I remember years ago watching a romantic movie that made me cry and wondering if love like that was real, or just a fantasy from the creative minds of writers or poets who also were secretly searching. Hollywood's brand of movie love, while close in some respects, is nothing like most of us have ever experienced. What we know as love is, more simply, a question: "Is this all there is?"

I always sensed that there was more. There had to be. In the end, what it comes down to is trust. We have to trust that with the universe, everything is as it should be. All things happen when they're supposed to happen. When God and the universe think we're ready, love will find us. Open your heart and live in each moment, and when you least expect it, it will find you. That's exactly how it happened with me ...


Front Porch of Forever
by CJ Heck

Only in dreams
where I felt safe and warm
did I long for the one
who would complete me.
I knew he was there,
my soul sensed his.
Through many lifetimes
I have known him.
All the way down
to my open heart
and waiting soul,
I knew he was there
because I felt him.

All the while,
it was you,
from so many years ago.
I knew
when we touched,
when I breathed you in,
there was magic.
You are the one.
You love me
with my weaknesses.
You don't blame me
for them.
You are my strength,
as I am also yours.
Within a cuddle
love brings us home.
You steady me
when I stumble
you give me your hand,
not disdain for
tripping over bumps
I didn't see.
Yours is the soul
that longs to
join my half with yours
to share this journey
in awareness,
ever mindful of the
magical beings we are.
You are the one.
I cradle your heart
in my hands
as you also hold mine.
We love in trust
for we have earned
this trust
by sharing
our vulnerability
with unconditional love.

Take my hand.
Walk with me
into tomorrow,
our yesterdays
the stepping stones.
Through endless time
we'll sit side by side
hand in hand
in our chairs
on the front porch
of forever.

I knew you were there.
I felt you.
From my soul
and from my heart,
I choose you
to love.


Happy Father's Day, everyone.
Hugs,
CJ

Wishing Our Lives Away

This morning, as I was brushing my hair in front of the mirror, my Spirit Guide, Dinahh, suddenly slammed into my mind with one of his whispers. He told me I was to write a blog about how people here are always wishing their lives away.

I listened to him, trying to form both an opinion about it so I would understand where I stood on the topic, and to lay a foundation -- how did I plan to broach the subject in my blog?

I had to admit, I could easily sense where he was coming from. We humans are guilty of that -- all too many of us really do wish our lives away, but in our defense, it's done only in ignorance and innocence. We wish it were the weekend because the job is stressful. We wish it were next week -- it's our evaluation and we hope to get the raise. We love the holidays and miss our families, so we wish Christmas would hurry and get here. Teens can hardly wait to grow up and be eighteen or twenty-one. Most parents look forward to their toddler's first words, or being potty-trained, or their first steps, and wish their little ones would grow to that particular age. When we're tired, we wish it was bedtime. I see exactly what Dinahh was talking about.

We're all guilty of it -- this wishing time would move faster, whether it's a year, a week, a day, or only a minute. Life is way too short as it is down here and we need to slow it down. We need to learn how to live in the moment, be aware of a simple blade of grass, the color of the sky, or how one drop of rain feels when it hits our skin. If we are aware, we can find the joy, the magic, in the now, and especially when holding a child or a lover close and feeling the incredible flow of love, the spiritual energy, which is flowing through us and everything in the universe.

There's magic in every second, it's already ours, and all we have to do is be aware of it, accept it as the gift it is. Let's agree to try harder to live in the moment. There's nothing wasted in the universe -- everything is exactly as, and where, it should be ... even us.

Serendipity vs. Whisper

Serendipity: good luck or good fortune in making an unexpected and fortunate discovery.

We never know when our life will touch another's in a meaningful way. I know most of us have had serendipitous chance meetings with someone -- like a whisper from the universe -- and it's suddenly like a little unexpected miracle occurs. It doesn't matter whether the meeting was beneficial to us, to the person we met, or maybe even beneficial to both.

What you suddenly sense is a little mind explosion that instantly tells you, "Wow, I was supposed to meet this person!" It's all a part of the magic of the universe, and all we have to do is be aware, listen to it when it happens, and of course, recognize it as such. Let me give you something to think about: maybe you met a soulmate and you were destined to help each other along your journey in this lifetime ... like what I experienced yesterday.

Yesterday, I met the nicest lady, Jen, while Robert and I were shopping at the perfume counter at Macy's in Altoona. I needed to replace my favorite perfume, Shalimar, and she had brought out several bottles of differing sizes and prices for me to choose from.

Amazingly, we recognized an almost instant rapport between us. She offered to fill my small purse-sized bottle of Shalimar for me and, while she was doing that, we got to talking and sharing. When she told me she used to be an elementary school teacher, one subject led to another and I gave her one of my business cards.

When she saw that I had a children's book published, she exclaimed, "Oh my God, this has to be fate! I knew I was supposed to meet you! See, I just love wiener dogs and I have six books that I've written about them. Right now, I'm looking for an illustrator to illustrate them so I can try and find a publisher. Please, where do I go from here?"

(Well, I had never met anyone at an expensive perfume counter who willingly filled a purse-sized spray bottle of Shalimar for free, either). I immediately felt the very same connection -- I sensed I was destined to meet her, as well. ("Thank you, God, and the Universe.")

Regarding her search for an illustrator for her books, I shared what I knew from my own reading about, and dealings with, publishers -- they most often discourage sending in manuscripts that are already illustrated, unless of course, you are an author/illustrator yourself. I told her she should get a copy of "Children's Writers and Illustrators" by Writers Digest Books, and she would see that the majority of publishers want to use their own staff illustrators. I suggested to Jen that she go ahead and send her book manuscripts out and save the money she would spend on illustrations -- of course, if she was planning to self-publish, that would be a different story. She said "no", she wanted a traditional publisher.

"How serendipitous", we say at first blush, "how lucky!" When in actuality, it isn't luck at all -- luck has nothing to do with it. That kind of thinking is only our brain's way of labeling the magic so our mind can accept the experiences according to society's limiting standards.

We have met a soulmate in this chance meeting, and yes, the meeting was serendipitous, in that it was unexpected and fortunate. But, when we open our hearts and really listen is when we can sense the magic and be aware -- these are spiritual whispers and everyone is capable of the magic. We are all inter-connected and one with the universe, because the same energy flows through us and all things.

Who knows, we may have millions of soulmates 'out there' that we have yet to meet, if we only take the time to open our hearts and listen ...

Prophetic Dreams:Visions

I am proud to introduce a friend and fellow writer, Janet Caldwell, aka Derailed Poet. She has agreed to share some of her prophetic dreams and visions and, like me, I'm sure you will also be stunned by her wonderful and amazing gift.

Janet is a published poet and author of "5 Degrees to Separation". To see more of her talented writing, I invite you to visit her at Author's Den.

Prophetic Dreams, Visions and Me
by Janet Caldwell

Since I was a small child I have had very vivid dreams and visions. When I say vision, I mean that I am awake and literally see an event. Sometimes the dreams or visions came true. Other times they were just a mix of my thoughts and the day's events all scrambled. As I got older I began to understand that some of the dreams and visions were prophetic and I could stop the outcome through prayer and meditation. The attempt to capture in words what was so incredibly real -- I hope to be able to do justice to both the dreams and visions.

When my son Michael was around eighteen, he asked if he could go on a trip to the beach with a couple of his friends. Immediately my head hurt and I saw a car crash. I told him absolutely not. He is aware of my gift and did not go. I told the other boys not to go but they just thought that I was crazy. That night we got a phone call. The two boys did have a car wreck and one of them was severely hurt and he did recover after quite some time. I sometimes wonder if my son had gone, whether he would have been killed or injured. I'm not certain how his being there would have altered these events, but I am forever grateful I did not have to find out.

On another occasion, I dreamed that my daughter who was a small child and lived with her grandparents would return to me. There was no reason to believe that circumstances in my life would make this possible. I dreamed that I was at work and she was sitting beside me, much older than she was at the time of the dream. She was probably eight at the time and when she was thirteen we reconnected and she came to visit me and I took her to work with me. She even had on the white denims and looked exactly as I had dreamed years earlier. I remember right after I had this dream I felt a great peace. Our relationship was restored and she came to live with me at the age of sixteen. She is almost twenty-nine now and well adjusted.

When I was very young, I had one particular dream over and over. In my dream, I walked outside my house and looked to the end of my street. I saw what looked like a giant bear. Huge, I mean King-Kong size, and it was coming slowly down the street towards my house. I could feel the earth rumble with each step. I was very frightened. I ran inside to the kitchen and hid behind the refrigerator. In reality there was no room for me to fit. I stayed awhile just shaking. Then, just like in the movies, I had to go out and look. He was still coming. However, there was a field across the street from my house and I looked and saw a body of water (not really there) and beyond that I saw a long table with Jesus in the center, his back to me. There were many people laughing and eating. I thought if I could only get across the water I will be safe. I don't remember how I got across but I did and Jesus put his arms around me and smiled. He asked me to sit down. I did. That is all that I remember but, in looking back, I know that Jesus was telling me that he loved me and though I might go through things (like the water) he would always be there. As a child of abuse, it was a great comfort to me. This dream contained a message: I am not alone.

Later in life, my cousin was going through a divorce and had four children to raise. She had no idea how she would get through. I was praying for her one day, and in front of my eyes, gift-wrapped boxes fell from the sky with beautiful ribbons. There were many boxes of all shapes and sizes. We talked about my vision and called it her “presents from God.” They always came, too. It may have been a particular bill that needed to be paid and she had no money to pay it and, out of the blue, someone would come to her and say “God told me to give this to you” and hand her cash or whatever she and the kids needed. I believe in God, always have, and always will. I also believe that he placed this gift in me. Sometimes I don't want it when I don't understand what it means.

Recently, I had a dream that my husband, Alan, and I were driving down the freeway. He was driving and all of a sudden he fell out of the car. I scooted over to the driver's side and looked in the rear view mirror and saw him doing cartwheels down the freeway. I was worried that I would run over him. He was going so fast that he caught up to my window. I pulled over, ran to him and called 911. The call went to another city in another state. I could not get the emergency response team. Finally, a man pulled over and called for me on his cell phone and an ambulance came. We sped to the hospital and he was fine. Then the scene changed and we were mountain climbing, except the mountain was made of petrified wood and very brittle. We were very high up and he fell down the mountain. I eventually climbed down and he was fine! We looked to the side of the mountain and there were stairs that looked as if they went to heaven. I laughed and said “We should have taken the stairs.” This dream has so many possibilities for meaning and I do not have the answer. I am still praying on this one. Maybe it's because he has had trouble with blood clots twice, came through it fine, and I am secretly worried. I don't know.

My Mom had this ability, too. When she was barely pregnant (1949) with my twin brothers, she had a dream that she looked in the rear view mirror of the car and saw a baby with two heads, four arms and four legs. Once she dreamed that my Dad got paid on a certain day and saw the check to the penny before it happened and he took the money and ran. This did happen. She also had a dream that a big bridge in Florida collapsed and two days later it did.

My brother died in 1980 and I was horribly upset. He was ten years older than me and the closest thing to a father that I ever had. The night that he died, we all stayed at my Mom's. I remember his daughter, Stephanie, slept in the bed with me. I am not sure if I was dreaming or not, but this is what happened. All of a sudden I was out of my body, I was looking at Stephanie and I asleep in the bed, sort of hovering. Then I heard my brother's voice. He told me, “I came to tell you that I made it. There are colors here that you have never seen. I'll see you when you get here.” It was his exact voice, but had a peaceful quality to it. That is all that I remember.

There are more, but I will save them for another time. I would like to thank CJ Heck for the opportunity to share my story.

Janet Caldwell
June 2010

Thank you, Janet, for sharing so much of yourself with us. Hugs, CJ

Dreams:Visions

“Dreams are illustrations... from the book your soul is writing about you.” ~Marsha Norman

In life, many thoughts are born in the course of a minute, an hour, a day. Some of those thoughts manifest again in our dreams, while some are actually visions. Often, we are unable to distinguish between the two.

To some people, a dream and a vision are one and the same; however, the reality is that not all dreams are visions. Much of our energy is lost in the fantasy of dreams because dreams never really bear fruit. But the same cannot be said of visions -- these are messages from the Universe, and each is meant for a different purpose in life.

Consequently, one person's vision cannot be that of another, no matter how similar it may seem. To have a vision, one must be prepared to receive it, and when it comes, to accept it. Thus, when these inner urges become reality, only then can visions be fulfilled. The spiritual side of the Universe knows everyone's heart and who to trust. How could a vision ever be given to someone to nurture if that person could not be trusted to carry it out? The message is simple: a spiritual commitment precedes a vision.

The other night I had what I first thought was a dream. I was in the woods, walking among the trees and enjoying the comforting silence. It was peaceful. Suddenly, I came to a clearing through the tall trees. In front of me was a river. The river was full of huge boulders and I could hear the roar of the rapids as the water raced over its course.

I don't know how I knew, but it was somehow obvious to me that I had to get to the other side of this raging river. There was no way I could wade across and I saw no rope strung from this side to that to hold onto to make my way across. As I stood by the bank and stared helplessly at the fast-moving water, I watched as a large flat stone began to slowly emerge from just under the surface of the water, about two feet out. A stepping stone!

I stepped out and onto the stone. Then it happened again. About two feet from me, another large flat stone emerged from the raging water. Then just as slowly another appeared, and another, until I was across the river on the other side. When I turned around, the stepping stones were gone. The helpless feeling was also gone and I felt free to continue my walk.

I didn't give any more thought to the dream, until a couple of major events occurred in my life, each a couple of days apart. Once recognized and the problems settled, it caused me to re-examine the dream. What I had experienced had suddenly allowed the dream to take on a whole new meaning. I began to see that it had a symbolic texture to it. It had been a vision of several problems which I would encounter and have to resolve. To check my awareness, I discussed the dream with Robert and he agreed.

As a part of my new and growing spiritual awareness, I am now being shown the subtle differences between dreams and visions -- how exciting! Hmmm, according to the vision, I still have a couple of problems ahead ... I wonder what those will be and if I will recognize them as such?

“The best thing about dreams is that fleeting moment, when you are between sleep and wakefulness, when you don't know the difference between reality and fantasy, when for just that one moment, you feel with your entire soul that the dream is reality and it really happened.”

Friday, June 11

Our grandchildren accept us for ourselves, without rebuke or effort to change us, as no one in our entire lives has ever done, not our parents, siblings, spouses, friends -- and hardly ever our own grown children. ~Ruth Goode

What could possibly be better than Christmas or a birthday, a visit from my spirit guide (Dinahh), a warm spring day, the gentle sound of rain while I'm drifting off to sleep, the first cup of coffee in the morning, walking barefoot on a beach and holding hands, the blue-blue-blue of the warm Caribbean, the first snow of winter, the sweet smell of freesia ...

That could only be the warm and fuzzy feelings you get, being with children and grandchildren.

Robert and I have a few things to get done first around here this morning and then we're driving to Connecticut. We've been invited to my grandson's (three-year old, Jack), birf-day pah-tee. I'm going to be a little scarce until we return on Sunday evening, but I'm sure you'll understand.

After all, what could possibly be better ...

"Gram-mee, you're not old. You're like ... you're like a cupcake with lotsa frostin' onna top ..." ~a grandchild

Ya gotta love 'em.
Hugs,
CJ

When I Finally Close My Eyes

Ink on paper is as beautiful to me as flowers on the mountains; God composes, why shouldn't we? ~Terri Guillemets

I've invited several people to be guest bloggers/writers here at Knowing Whispers. I respect them all very much. They've had some interesting experiences and I'm looking forward to sharing what they're going to write about. I haven't received any articles, as yet, but I'm sure in time I will.


When I Finally Close My Eyes
by CJ Heck

When I close my eyes
for the last time
in this lifetime,
I want to have lived,
really lived.
I want to know
I've tasted
the smorgasbord of life.
relishing the good
and spitting
the bad back out,
knowing at least
I tried it.
When I'm done here,
I won't have to wonder
whether someone caught
the kiss I threw,
I'll know.
I don't want to leave here
with my heart as empty
as my pockets have been
so I've opened my heart
and I'll live each day
as though it were my last.
I want to know,
without a doubt,
that I've left
something of me behind,
something that's good,
not regret
for never making a difference.
When I close my eyes
for the very last time,
I would like someone
to remember

I was here.

Synchronicity:

My blog yesterday was a review of a book I'm reading, Unexpected Miracles, which vividly teaches us what the gift of synchronicity is. I'm still not quite finished reading the book, but I've already learned what synchronicity is and how to recognize it in our lives when we are aware. Amazingly, I see it in my own life and I would like to share two stories with you. After reading them, I know you will see how these unexpected miracles have touched yours, as well.

The first is a true story that the author of the book, Dr. David Richo, chose to use as an example of synchronicity:

He watched as his eight-year old son, Josh, ran down to the edge of the pond with bread all broken into duck-sized bites in anticipation of feeding the ducks. When he got to the pond, his face showed only disappointment and despair -- not one white feather anywhere.

His choice: keep the bread for another time or cast it upon the water anyway: tardy ducks might come on some other Joshless day.

His face lit up. The choice was made. A toss --
Then a rallied smile on a revived face! With that toss, an arrow of ducks suddenly appeared gliding, single-pointedly, to his feet: there were more than he had even expected, coming closer than ever he had hoped, from thin air, from nowhere, everywhere!

This is synchronicity, an unexpected miracle ... and may it always happen like that, Josh.

The other story I want to share is also true, but it happened many years ago, during the Great Depression. Every Christmas Eve, on cue as a tradition, my mama told us the story about her father, our Grampa Shannon, and "The Shannon Christmas Miracle".

The story begins a few days before Christmas when mama was very young. She was the middle child with an older and a younger brother. As with most families during the Depression, Grandma and Grampa had very little money. They told the children that Santa might not be able to visit them this year. With things being so scarce, Santa had been really having a hard time finding supplies to make any toys this year. Why, he even had to let a few of the elves go, and some of the reindeer were given to the zoo because he didn't have enough food to feed all of them.

Mama told us that she and her brothers understood, but being children, they were still anticipating Santa's arrival, just the same. They felt so sure they had been good with all of the things they did to help out, that Santa would surely bring each of them a present.

It was true. They had been good. The boys walked up and down the railroad tracks every morning picking up chunks of coal that had fallen from the train and putting them in the coal hod to carry home for heating their house. Mama helped her mother clean a house after school for a wealthy family in town and she worked hard. Her daddy spent every day all day long in town trying to find some kind of work to pay a few bills and take care of his family.

Mama said she could hear her parents talking quietly in their room after she and her brothers had gone to bed. Grampa was no different than hundreds of other men who couldn't find any work. There were no jobs and it was a very bad time. Mama told us his face was drawn and tight and he seemed unusually sad.

Mama always let that part sink in and then she went on with the story. Now it was the day before Christmas. Our grampa still hadn't found any work and this day wasn't looking any better. He was at his lowest point. He sat down on the curb with his feet in the gutter, elbows on his knees, head in his hands and, as it started to snow, he began to cry out of total desperation. He was thinking how he felt he had failed his family and himself and here it was, almost Christmas. He had hoped to bring home a turkey for Christmas dinner and something for each of the children and his wife for Christmas.

Suddenly a brisk wind kicked up. The snow blew hard against him and he shivered and drew his light coat tighter around him. As he started to stand, his legs slipped out from under him and he went down hard. Just when things were at their worst, he looked down beside him and right there, half buried in the snow, was a crumpled fifty dollar bill. He could hardly believe his eyes -- that was a whole lot of money -- it was a miracle ... and from that day on, it was forever called "The Shannon Christmas Miracle".

Those are two examples of synchronicity, folks. As you can see, it's similar to a coincidence, but it's so much more. It's actually an unexpected miracle. If you would like to email me some of your own examples, I will gladly publish them here in one of my blogs to share with everyone: poeticlady99@yahoo.com

Synchronicity precipatates events that can suddenly or slowly redirect the course of our life or the outcome of a situation.

Now, back to my book ...

Have a great day!
Hugs,
CJ

Book Review: Unexpected Miracles

Today's blog is going to be devoted to a book I'm reading -- it's that good -- I'm not done reading it and yet I'm already recommending it to anyone with an interest in spiritual awareness.

The book is wonderful: "Unexpected Miracles, The Gift of Synchronicity and How to Open It", is written by a Ph.D., by the name of David Richo.

The book is filled with stories and examples, and combining insights from psychology, religion, and poetry, Unexpected Miracles shows how synchronicity -- a meaningful coincidence -- works in daily life, in dreams, and in our imagination. It helps us not only to recognize synchronicity, but to cultivate these wonderfully unexpected and perfectly normal spiritual events.

I had heard about synchronicity, but I never really knew what it meant until I began to read this book. Dr. Richo is a gifted writer. He takes this concept and brings it to full life. His work is thorough, creative, and thought-provoking. His intellect and humor run through each page as he explains what synchronicity is, giving poignant examples you can recognize from your own everyday life. I've learned already that when we recognize and say "yes" to these "unexpected miracles," we begin to further awaken spiritually, grow psychologically, and even better understand our purpose in life.

I've already begun to recognize many synchronicities that I've experienced and, after I finish the book, I'll talk about some of them -- I will also invite you to share yours.

Enjoy your day!
Hugs,
CJ

Thoughts on Love:

"Your task is not to seek love, but merely to seek and find all the barriers within yourself that you have built against it." ~Rumi

I find it interesting that the more aware I become, the more I recognize that nothing we attempt to accomplish in this lifetime can ever be accomplished without love. Love is the actual creative force of the universe. Love allows everything else to happen -- only love allows us to see who we really are and what our true capabilities are. The mind, or ego, only lets us see our self in terms of how the world sees us. Without love, what we project to the world through our ego is self-limiting and, therefore, it's the most we can ever expect from others.

Without love, we have nothing: no creative energy, no compassion, no forgiveness, and certainly no trust -- we have literally no way to contribute anything valuable to anyone, least of all ourselves. Life becomes a void, something to stumble through each day.

When we open our self up to love, there are no guarantees we'll find the love of our life, but we will experience life in a whole new way. Our true self, the loving self will emerge -- this is who we were meant to be. This is the energy, the life, the very essence of the universe, flowing through us and it brings us back to where we began.

What is a key to opening our hearts to love? Between two people in a relationship, it's allowing ourselves to trust the other person's love of us enough to be open and honest (vulnerable) with them in the relationship. What separates one from the other are a series of walls between them. What builds those walls? Fear, ego, lack of trust, a fear of intimacy, and a fear of being totally vulnerable all contribute to walls. They're ego-based and for self-protection. We can't love through or from behind walls.

When two people love each other, they have to trust enough in their love to open their hearts and show their vulnerability. Everyone has a dark side. We all have things we bury deep, things we've shared with no one. We don't want to bring them out into the light because they're painful and we fear being judged. In a relationship, we even fear our partner may condemn us for these things and leave. Again, this is the ego trying to enslave us.

To love the way the universe intends, the ego must be put aside. One by one, the walls have to come down over time for growth to occur in a relationship. Holding back is only our ego covering for our own fears -- the fear of being totally honest, and the fear of rejection. Love is a lot stronger than we give it credit for -- love grows, (no, thrives!) in the intimacy of open hearts. That's what we humans call unconditional love. Mutual respect grows by knowing your partner's faults, granting forgiveness, and feeling their pain. It gives a renewed closeness -- with the freedom to give our understanding and compassion, we can also forgive ourselves and as a result, it cleanses us and deepens love. As a secondary gift, as a result of mutual acceptance and deeper love, it brings renewed self-love to us.

There is an old saying that mama used to say a lot when I was growing up: "To thine own self be true." It wasn't until recently that I really understood what she meant. I believe another key to opening our heart to love is self-acceptance. We have to first be honest with ourselves, but no matter where we are at any particular moment, it's right for us at that time.

Choosing our Path

"In the end,
these things matter most:
How well did you love?
How fully did you live?
How deeply did you let go?"
~ Siddartha Gautama

There are times when it seems the universe has such ornery plans for us. It trifles with our hearts and emotions, never being specific, but all the while nudging us along and expecting us to choose our own path through life. God and the universe have given us wonderful, magical tools to help us on our journey. All we really have to do is open our hearts.

Ironically, the path we choose doesn't really matter. There are many lessons to learn in this lifetime -- they're all along any possible path we could ever choose. As you become aware, you'll remember lessons you've learned before and not repeat them. There is no right or wrong way to go. Every decision we make is the right one for us, in this lifetime. Each choice brings us down a different path, but what to remember is this: every path can bring us spiritual awareness, the destiny is always our enlightenment.

In our ignorance, we fail to see the one truth: all there really is, is love. Love and infinity. Plain, simple, beautiful. I know. It's all pretty amazing ... and it's tough to grasp until you see with your heart how very simple it really is.

We're all so used to our minds controlling us that we only give our hearts a secondary role. Even that, for some, is too close. They waste the entirety of a lifetime holding back, covering up, or even denying they have a heart full of feelings and emotions. Relationships suffer as a result, because by keeping the heart in check, it's never truly opened to the love and magic that flows from the universe, its ultimate gift to us.

Once our hearts are open, we will see we are not alone. Our hearts will recognize another gift -- the many soulmates we will meet along our journey. When a soul is born, it is born into a group of souls. Those souls are the closest to ours in form and spiritual makeup. That is why we have the feeling we've known someone all our lives, even when we've only just met. There are lessons to be learned (and taught) with each soulmate we meet. Only if our hearts are open and loving, can we truly know and share love; only then can we bring up the past to heal it and ultimately let it go.

We have to still our minds and open our hearts. We have to allow our hearts to be vulnerable. The energy from the universe will flow through our heart, allowing us to see and remember that we're all one with the universe -- infinity -- no beginning, no end. That is the universe in it's purest simplicity. We've all been here before and we will again.

Open your heart. Feel the love. Accept the gifts.